Be Nobody's Darling

I lost my Mom to breast cancer at age 48 in 1998.  She was fiercely independent, and did her best to raise me to be the same.  I have an older brother, but my Mom truly believed that girls should be raised differently than boys, as they encounter a unique set of challenges in life.  She was pretty unconventional, and she always taught me to think outside of the box.  There were times as a young girl that this was challenging, but in the end I am so grateful for this gift that she gave me.  A fresh perspective.

When I was in high school she had one of her favorite poems, Be Nobody's Darling by Alice Walker, written in calligraphy for me and hung it on my bedroom wall.  Right at eye level next to my bed.  Since then, it has been an inspiration for me-- it is about finding your voice, and not being afraid to use it; not fearing what others think about you.

Here is the poem in its entirety:

Be Nobody's Darling by Alice Walker

Be nobody's darling;

Be an outcast.

Take the contradictions

Of your life

And wrap around

You like a shawl,

To parry stones

To keep you warm.

Watch the people succumb

To madness

With ample cheer;

Let them look askance at you

And you askance reply.

Be an outcast;

Be pleased to walk alone

(Uncool)

or line the crowded

river beds

with other impetuous

Fools.

Make a merry gathering

On the bank

Where thousands perished

For brave hurt words

They said.

Be nobody's darling;

Be an outcast

Qualified to live

Among your dead...... 

Of course I had no idea at the time what the future held, and that my Mom's life would end at such a young age.  She died with grace, showing strength as we all crumbled, yet again an example to us all.

My project for this week's Whiplash competition is a pillow with a picture of my Mom as a young Scout (a Brownie to be exact) with the words "Be Nobody's Darling" emblazoned across her head.

This is to serve as a reminder to me to not have fear, as she did not, in life and in death.  I used some fabulous vintage girl scout fabric for the pillow (which I was afraid to cut!).

I am very happy with this little pillow.  I love the way the sweet image of my Mom as a little girl, with her whole life ahead of her is juxtaposed against the somewhat harsh words.  I put her on a chair in my bedroom, where she can remind me each day to live life to its fullest.

Comments

[lisa]

beautiful post. that has long been one of my favorite poems as well. thank you for reminding me of its power!

[Ali]

That is a beautiful tribute to your Mother. Thankyou for sharing her wisdom.

[Lady K]

That poem is awesome and so is the pillow. I love the picture, the fabric and the sentiment!

[gkgirl]

this is a beautiful idea.
i love how you took one idea
and completely transformed it...
i hope you win the whiplash
competition
but it's obvious from your writing
that this was not done for that
sole purpose...

have a great day!

[tuscanycastlegirl]

This pillow is really special.
The photo is beautiful!
Truly Art.

[Jessica Hood]

I love this! The poem is beautiful & the pillow is fabulous! Very nice tribute to a special woman.

[bekka]

lovely idea. the photo of your mom as a girl scout is classic. and the scouting fabric is retro and wonderful. this is my favorite of this week's entries.

[Shiso Mama]

what a wonderful and heartfelt tribute to an inspiring woman. the pillow is so beautiful. i really love it.

[escheva]

This really strikes a chord with me.

My mom is currently fighting breast cancer; she is 55. She is strong in the face of fear and has always been unabashedly unconventional. I am on the other side of the world to her, but I know that she will be okay, because of her strength.

Thank you for this entry.

[mrspilkington]

thank you so much for what you've shared here. it means a lot to me personally, and it inspires me creatively. beautiful work, all around.

[mandy]

thank you for sharing that poem and the story behind the pillow.

[Gisele Schoene]

Beautiful!!
Moving!!!

[Slynne]

I adore your pillow and the meaning behind it only makes all the more wonderful. What a great tribute to your mother.

[Blair]

What a beautiful and inspiring post. Your mom sounds like an amazing woman. What a wonderful gift you have given yourself and your mom's memory with that wonderful pillow, I love it in every way. Thanks for sharing with us.

[Rachel]

Such a beautiful post. Thank you for sharing the beauty and wisdom of your mother. And the pillow is amazing.

[Kristin]

Thank you for that lovely post. It is a beautiful pillow.

[Croque-choux]

I absolutely LOVE what you've done for this week's Whiplash theme! This is beautiful and so is your post. My fave hands down-

[Emily]

I really love your pillow and your idea. I lost my Mom unexpectedly two months ago (she was 61), and have been looking for ways to deal with it creatively. I've got a family cookbook in the works, but you've really inspired me to do something with some of her old photos.

[andrea from the fishbowl]

This is beautiful in every way. And I haven't come across that poem before. Thank you. I will pass it along to my own daughters.

[Linda Woods]

I love your pillow! What a wonderful way to remember your mother.

[p]

fabulous post, fabulous woman, fabulous poem, fabulous pillow...and i can't wait to share that poem with my daughter...

[Jo]

As the mother of two little girls, your post is beautiful and reminds me of all the things that I want to empower my girls with. Your mother sounds like she was an amazing and wonderful woman. Thank you for sharing her with us.

[Bessilu]

What a wonderful tribute and message. I had never heard that poem before and am so glad you shared it. Thank you!

[Teresa]

The picture of your Mom at the beginning of your post brought tears to my eyes and the rest of the post went straight to my heart.

Your Mom would be so proud of you.

[abbyjane]

Wow. What a powerful post. A lovely pillow and a lovely picture of your mom as a grown woman, too. You brought tears to my eyes.

[NessieNoodle]

I am loving your blog- your words, your thoughts, your creativity and your work.
Very inspiring.

Thank you for sharing this post with all of us.

[Alex]

What a beautiful and moving post and idea, to make this pillow! It brought tears to my eyes.
Thank you so much for sharing the poem!

[Dacia Ray]

That is one gorgeous pillow. It's wonderful to have sentiment behind it, too. And, that fabric is soooo cool. :)

[Janice]

Wonderful post. Thank you for sharing the poem.

[Hagit]

Wow, what a strong message. Thanks for sharing this, I think she must have been an amazing person to put that in your room. I'm going to print it out.

[Holly]

If you don't mind, I'd love to post this on my blog... with a link back to you. I just love it so much!

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